HOW THE INTERNET CHANGED THINGS: NOTES ON FRIENDSHIP

I recently watched Zoella's Q&A video and I found what she saying about friendship to be really interesting. She is right, not enough people focus on friendship and friendship developed online well at least not as much as romantic relationships. In this day and age, where social media has almost taken over our lives (well for me at least) more and more friendships are developed online - I have so many friends that I have never met, it's so surreal.

What Zoe said about not easily trusting everyone and jumping into a friendship with anyone and everyone, really resonating with me. I understand that for someone in her position,  it's reasonable to be wary of people that want to be your friend or want to be in your inner circle. I find that incredibly scary and I don't know about her but it would drive me insane. However, I am that person on the other side and I wanted to discuss it from my point of view as the person on the other side.

As a blogger, I get invited to events and at some of these events I met 'big bloggers'. I find it so hard to talk these bloggers because it's always that the back of my head that I might appear to don't want to  1 a fangirl (not that being a fangirl is not cool, it's really cool I can be the biggest fangirl) and/or 2 as someone that wants to befriend them for my own gain. It could also be that I am just a nervous and shy person especially when it comes to meeting new people. Nonetheless, that thought always crosses my mind and it makes me uncomfortable and hesitant to approach these certain individuals. I think it's heightened by the fact that I am also a blogger because there could be this hidden agenda like I don't know, you know what I mean right? I remember I went to this event recently, and there was a blogger I really like. I have followed her for ages, but I stood there contemplating for at least 10 minutes on whether I should go up to her. I know it sounds crazy but I am so awkward and then I have that added pressure of not wanting to come across in that way, trust me it's hard. By the way in the end, I decided to go up to her and she was amazing.

It's so hard not to feel like an outsider in these situations since it's natural people for people to stick with people they know. I would do the same. I hate to be the one that disrupts their conversation and is hey talk to me. A lot of this, I understand is to do with my social anxiety and also the complexity that surrounds friendships that has been reinforced by social media. Do you know what it feels like, an American high school tv series, you know where the uncool kid is lurking around trying to be friends with the cool kids. I hope you guys get what I am trying to say because I feel lost in my thoughts.

I think, what I am trying to say is that it's hard on both sides and that social media politics doesn't always make it easy. I am super interested in what your thoughts are, so let me know.

Zeynab x