A WEEKEND'S MUSINGS XIV: PUSHING OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

Photo by Joanna Kosinska

I have always found it difficulty approaching people and being the one to start a conversation, I just find it incredible awkward. It's not that I am not an extrovert it just that have introverted tendencies especially with people that I don't know. I feel like I have always been like this, I am the shy girl with loads of friends because they made the effort to get to know me. But I have learnt to make it work for me, it hasn't always gone to plan sailing and sometimes I have made a fool out of myself ( big fool) that's just part of life.

Everyone experiences a degree of apprehensive when it comes to approaching new people. Some people -like me- more than others but that is fine, I have come to accept that as one of many flaws. I am the person that usually stays in the same spot (generally in the far corner, come and say hi) in event situations. As a blogger, I am constantly pushing the boundaries of my comfort zone. There have been so many occasions where I have been presented with amazing opportunities or events to really cool events but I just can't do it because I have talked myself out of it. Or I will go and be to shy to anyone else - usually why I never go without a friend. 

I remember one event, it was a really flash event as soon as I entered I felt unbearable uncomfortable. I made a beeline for the bathroom and locked myself in one of the cubicles . Writing this I recognise how ridiculous it sounds. Lucky I was able to make a friend, in the toilets (I knew the toilets was a good idea) and I literally stuck with her the whole night. I don't know how she felt about it but she was great, so confident and through her I got the opportunity to talk to some many other people without having to put myself out there (I know it's the easy way out, but it was a matter of survival).

Often I feel like I don't where I fit into the blogging community, I feel like I am just drifting and I have no real place. This feeling is eating away at me and is frequently a catalyst for me questioning the worth of my blog - not a pretty place. It sounds incredible childish but the community can be a little clique and everyone has cemented there place in their clique (just my opinion). As individual with introverted tendencies, too often I myself just sticking to myself and not spending the time and effort to get to know all the great bloggers out there. This is something I am working on, putting myself out there and approaching people (just thinking about it freaks me out). I am uncertain about the outcome, it could either something that is life changing (you never know) or it could go terrible wrong .

What I Have Been Reading: 

A Little Update, by Emma Gannon

Meet Three Women Happy To Be Child Free By Choice, by Amy Lewis 

Career Advice No One tells You About by Raghav Haran

Remember When Aaliyah and Jet Li Fell In Love In '' Romeo Must Die'', by Dolly Li 

Fuck Changing Yourself, by Jessica Semaan

Listening: 

I can't believe I only discovered this podcast last week - shame on me. I love it, definitely makes my journey into and from work bearable. I am just binging on all of the past episodes. I couldn't think of a better way to describe, ''another Round is basically happy hour with friends you haven’t met yet. Grab a drink and yell along with your preferred electronic device as we talk about everything from pop culture to squirrels to racism to sexism to male strippers to literally everything''. Check it out and let me know what you think (if ever Tracey and Heben do ever this post, I am so down for the TV club). 

That's it from me (now I feel like a presenter), make sure you check out my no more Sunday blues post and favourite relaxing evening routine to prepare you for a kick ass week. 

Zeynab x